Enter one tied up Cassandra strapped to a chair in front of a table, with Cyrene sitting besides her with her legs kicked up. And glasses on her face.
Uh oh. Cassie would receive a nudge, as she groaned..
“Fine, fine! This is Cyrene’s First Official Smash or Pass Tier List! Which shouldn’t even work because how do you rank Smash or pa-“
Cyrene had suddenly slapped her hand over her mouth, “Jim”ing the camera, alongside shaking her head. “She’s useless. I’ll auction her off to the highest bidder later-“ Cut to Cassie having a weird expression as she heard that “- But anyways! Here’s the disclaimer! And lets get on to it! Cassie’s just here so I can bounce my speech off her btw-!”
Disclaimer: Whatever Cyrene says is not reflective of me or anyone. I just decided to do this for fun, and was in character the whole time so some comments are rude, some comments are complimentary, some are just horny.. and some are crazy. Cyrene may rank people she likes low and people she hates high, because this is how HOT she thinks they are, so apologies in advance! Oh and she’s biased as fuck! Enjoy!
Cyrene’s ranking system for her Smash or Pass is as follows
S+ :- She likes you the best of the bunch. This is not necessarily a good thing because Cyrene is crazy, but it means that she finds you attractive, appealing, and thinks highly of you over other most wrestlers she’s seen. You’re basically a celebrity in her own twisted mind, and she WILL try and make you hers if she meets you. Just a warning
S :- Cyrene holds a good degree of respect for you and would hands down go on a date, break your door down just to kiss you, or beat your shit in right now, no questions asked. She digs your vibe and would love to hang out.. probably the best tier for your safety.
A :- She figures you’re pretty cool. Nothing THAT great but she probably likes a few aspects about you and has probably peeped at some of your matches.
B :- Doesn’t think exceptionally highly of you, but you’re hot and is prone to changing if she gets to know you.
C :- Who dis? Cy doesn’t think too much of you and is gonna be mean, and on occasion just puts people in here to talk smack
Anyways.. lets get this show on the road!!
Ducky Williams (A- Tier) “Fat ass, sittable face.. stealable cap, hot sister..? Smash.”
Black Swan (S- Tier)
“Smash. Girls in lucha masks automatically bump themselves up A Tier. Well if I like the mask. And the red and black is a godly color combo. I should know. Plus, I love her little goofy ass wings on the outfit!”
Mama Bear (S- Tier) “I don’t know about you Cassie, but I would let her be my mommy any day of the fucking WEEK! Her little bear ears are cute too. Pass.
..
.. what? I’m not into doing milfs and the woman has a husband. What do you MEAN I was simping? I don’t simp! I just said what I wanted her to do! Which is sit on me and take care of me after!”
El Rey del Cielo (A-Tier) “Buddy, what is UP with that dumb outfit and costume? You look like a duck! And the outfight is so tight, mia verde mia verde..”
“Cyrene.. that means.. my green. You don’t speak spanish. Staph.”
“Shut up. ayaaaa, mi amor.. anyways. Smash.”
“What..?”
Lockjaw (B- Tier) “Cy.. Cyrene, don-”
“Lock your jaw on deez nuts!! AHAHA!!”
“.. help.. me.”
“Anyways.. she’s a redhead, who I want to dom to prove my dominance over redheads.. but I feel she’d bite me if I sat on her face. I don’t feel kinky enough so.. Pass!!”
Elizabeth Wild (A-Tier) “Rawr. Im into this lady for sure! Smash!”
“Did you rawr unironically..?”
Viola Rosethorne (S-Tier) “Is it the mas-”
“Yes. That and the fact that she has some thick thighs! I said I wasn’t into milfs and she technically isn’t a milf so.. Smash!”
Sienna Nekta (A-Tier) “Ain’t you a cutie! Sienna and me go way back, I might just have something planned with her too..!
Pass!!”
Arma-Gil-O (C-Tier) “Heh. Hiiiiiii Gil, dearie.. I’m watching you! Oh and you’re in C Tier because your booty completely unimpressed me for a “smother” princess. Smash, just because you’re fun to see writhe-”
“I am.. so sorry Gil.”
Tina Meyers (A-Tier) “You’re built! You got some real power in your body and you rep the vintage wrestling ways, and you rep em well, god damn. Smash!!”
Karen Adams (A-Tier) “You’re built as well- wh-ew… but ya look like a whole ass bottom to me. Oh yeah, 100%! Pass!”
Alizeh Midori (C-Tier) “You the lamest wrestler in the whole circuit. You look like mint chocolate, with vomit hair, but roadkill. PLUS your whole gig is.. You don’t even HAVE A GIG!? WHAT THE HELL? God you’re such a lame-o face. Essentially, you’re dommable. That counts for something.
Smash.”
“HEY! TH-.. wut.”
Piper Sherwood (B-Tier) “I bet I could break more bones in an hour with my fists than she could with a bat. Plus, why tf you Sherwood and don’t have a Robin Hood theme? Pass!”
Izuku Midoriya (S Tier) “Superhero huh? Well I’ll gladly be the Catwoman to your Batman- tho I doubt you’d win any skirmishes between us! Oh and.. UUUUUNITEDDDDOOO STATES OFFFF Smash!!”
Selket (B Tier) “Mama got dem legs! I approve! Though I dunno if I’d Smash or Pass.. Hrmm.. you’re a.. Pass for now!”
Tracy Cannon (A Tier) “Girl reminds me of Dick Grayson, with a slightly less phenomenal ass. But she can’t live up to my unreasonable expectations of his ass, so Pass!!..
.. Actually that ass IS preetttyyy fat. Smash!”
Kat Hart (B Tier) “Fun fact about Kat, she a frickin shortie?? I did not know she was five eleven, thats almost five feet if you round down! Damn, I guess the Super Kitty has to be built like a tank to compete.. Kinky. But I also feel if I hugged her, she would crush me. I like to DO the crushing 95% of the time! Pass!
Aurora Estrella (S Tier) “Whiskers. I wonder how she drinks milk. Do the milk stay on the whiskers? Also why is there no Black Cat themed SWAT Cat? Blasphemy. You’re a Pass until you convince Kat to add me as the Black Cat. I have a costume, actually.”
Sandy White (S+ Tier) “MY MY!! You and me lady, I’m gonna fight you, I’m gonna straight up break you in the ring and dominate you i bed RIGHT after- hell i aint even waitin for the bed- Smash.”
“Didn’t you say muscled wo-..”
“Shush.”
Kimiko (A Tier) “You’re horny. Your wrestling outfit is three sizes too small. And you look like a neon poster. I wholeheartedly approve and if I ever fight you, toothpaste girl, I won’t leave you a bloody mess. Just a pinned one. Smash.”
Arachne W Spyder (S Tier) “You are the CUTEST wrestler I’ve ever seen. You remind me of my old pet spider, Web-bruh. He died under my feet one day..
Pass.”
“.. A-are you crying?”
“No. I do not cry. GET BACK IN THERE TEAR!”
“What the absolute fu-”
Honie B Bea (S Tier) “Hello yeah, bakery? I want a six pack of Honey Buns, and Honies buns to boot. Where would I like them? IN MY FAAAAAAAAAAAAACEEEEEEE!!”
“.. honestly I don’t blame you.”
“Smash?” “Smash.”
Antonia A Ant (C Tier) “You stinkface and you have a stinger on your ass. THAT IS SO CRUEL!! You’re gonna poke someones eye out!”
“Honie has one too thou-”
“I dont caRe, herr butt stinger is a safety hazard! What ants even have stingers!? Pass!!”
Kasumi Oshiro (B-Tier) “Pass but your finisher is d i v i n e. So is your booty!”
Drake Vyril (B Tier) “You can slide into my dms any day, cuz you fineee! But don’t think cause you gotta cute face, it’ll protect you from being absolutely c r u s h e d by yours truly in the ring!”
Ichika Rei (A Tier) “Honestly wild it took me THAT long to find a bluenette. But she’s pretty cute though, and I definitely think I could be her top. Plus, she’s a Phoenix! They’re “Rei-nowned” for their healing powers! Means she can take a lotta smashing and get out still being able to walk..
.. challenge accepted! Smash!”
Noelle Silva (A Tier) “She looks solid. Normally I laugh at people with silver hair and call them old cunts but she’s the best of the lot! Pass though, she ain’t my type.”
Skylar Jones (S Tier) “Oh Sky. Hrm. I like her, but Sky also plays the heroine a lot.. but it is fun to annoy her. S Tier! Smash!.. actually wait, Pass would make her more annoyed, so Pass!”
Maya Jones (S+ Tier) “Its cause-“
“Yeah its cause I wanna make a I fucked your mom joke with Skylar. Smash.
Karen Starring (A-Tier) “She’s got a HUGE.. personality. An absolutely MASSIVE heart. Immensely GINORMOUS ring presence.
And nice boobs. Pass!”
Eileen Sommers (A Tier) “.. hey Cyrene.. she kinda looks like you.. could be your mom or something!”
“What? No she doesn’t! She’s from GERMANY, I’m Scottish! Besides she’s too young to have had me so she’s safe..!”
“.. why did you know that before looking at the profile? Have you been looking at all the Law redheads to see who your mom could be? If so that’s so swee- OW!! YOU PUNCHED ME?! MY MOUTH IS BLEEDING YOU FUCKING FU-
“Excuse me. Technical difficulties. I say Smash.”
Amelie Roux (S Tier) “This lady has THE best wrestling outfit I’ve seen, and I say that being an avid fan of fishnets with hers having NONE. Hers is 10/10, no questions asked. Smash!”
Amano Jaku (S Tier) “You know how I said Arachne was cute? She’s the same. Frickin adorable, specially with her lightbulb hairdo. She calls herself a Demon though, that’s pretty interesting.. dunno what Aiki is. Is that Asian Nike? Sponsored brand? Anyways.. Smash!”
Skeleton Mary- Kurusu Mari (A Tier) “She’s-
“Cute? Yeah, I know.”
“What? How could you-“
“You say everyone thats small and has a weird-creepy gimmick is cute.”
“But they ARE. Specially her! I bet she’d glow in the dark! Pass!”
Aika Sakata (S Tier) “Holy hell girl-! I know Law is filled with fit girls with amazing bods, but you balance fit and cute perfectly! I’d love to meet you someday! Smash!”
Gisele LeBlanc (A Tier) “Powderbuff is the best name EVER. And it says here you’re a French Cannon? Does she shoot out of a cannon?
“.. canadian, Cyrene.. Canadian..”
“Oh.. but does she shoot out of a cannon?”
“.. i would strangle you right now.”
“But your hands are tied! Literally! Anyways.. screw it, Smash! Hit me with a call!”
Leona Chase-Arawn (A-Tier) “Night Huntress? Well you can hunt me any day- + mask and a dope cloak so Smash!
Alice William Taylor (C Tier) “You are THE second most basic bitch I’ve ever seen! Behind Skylar! If you gotta problem with that, cmere and throw hands! Pass!”
Aziza (A Tier) “I.. havent seen this chick wrestle, like.. ever, but jesus if that body wouldn’t work me over like a meat processor I’ll eat my hat. Sma-Pass.. pa.. Smash.. unsure!”
Alaina Sanders (S Tier) “Huh. She and the previous entry kinda look similar.. but Alaina got them HIPS! And that bootay! Smash..
..! What the fuck she’s FORTY SEVEN? SHES TWICE MY AGE?”
“Yeah, and as you’re not into milfs I’ll just put down pa-“
“Nope. This is Alaina Sanders. Even if she was sixty, i’d Smash! She’s like one of the few chicks I don’t think I could beat.. within five minutes.”
JJ Janella Johnson (S Tier) “I LOVE the combination of turquoise blue, purple, and darker skin. Top tier!”
“.. but I have a combination of turquoise blue, purple and darker ski-.. wow, you’re so mean to me.”
“Yup. Smash!”
Peggy McIntyre (A Tier) “Cyrene, I know that look.. Cyrene N-“
“I wonder if Peggy could take my Peg in its McIntyre-ty..! Ahahahah!! Oh yeah, she’s Irish. Sweet! She’s basically my sister, I take a blood oath to protect her! Pass tho.. maybe. We’ll see! Now I just need a human sacrifice for my oath! Cassie cmere!”
“GET AWAY FROM ME!!”
Ryoma (A Tier) “FINALLY! A DILF!”
“I don’t think he’s that old..”
“He’s a dilf with a divine booty and I would Smash him to high hell! 100%!”
Matsuri Sato (A Tier) “You know, I figured I would have met a pink haired chick WAY before this. Like way, WAY before this. But she’s got that ass and she got that pinnable face! Approved!
“You mean Smash?”
“Yeah. I mean Smash.”
Akiko Kikuchi (C Tier) “Heh. NEERDDD!! You came with braces to the arena? Ahahah!
“Cy, stop being mean.. I think she’s cute!”
“Oh she’s cute, but she’s also a nerd. A Smashable nerd! Smash!”
Killer King (S Tier) “You.. really put King in S?”
“Yup.”
“You’re a masochist.”
“I don’t denyyy that but I ain’t gonna lose to King in a match. Gonna beat his ass and Smash HIM for a change! So- Smash!”
Nathan Ballwin (B Tier) “.. is his gig putting balls in your face? It IS? It kinda seems like it is. That’s fucking hilarious, he’s an absolute chad! He literally teabags you! Do I wanna Smash him..? I’ll decide after I get a match with him.”
Beowulf (A Tier) “HEYY!! Bro looks GOOD! He may be a little obnoxious seeming but my man! I subscribe to WOLFAMANIA!! Smash!”
Trixie Hart (B Tier) “So like, clussy fever.. is a thing now. Well I must be immune cause that’s a Pass! Clowns freak me out!”
Emaline (A Tier) “Viper mommy. Y’know I always thought Emaline had green hair but pink isn’t bad either. Green on green would have been disgusting, agreed. Anyways I would let her choke me but she would also probably elbow me in the fucking throat. Pass.”
Selene Sugar (A Tier) “She has a crazy winning record, jesus.
.. I could take her.”
“In a fight, right?”
…
“In a fight, right?”
“Sure. Smash!”
Lu Sahgirl (C Tier) “Did your parents fuck up middle school or something? Who calls their precious child a Losergirl?? Pass!”
Saori Aiko (A Tier) “She’s ALSO a nerd, but she got drip! I adore the little face thingy on her rack. Now you may be asking, “would I hit a gal with glasses?” Heck yeah! I’d take her glasses and hit her with it! So my advice, make some glasses-goggles! Smash!”
Mary Clairson (B Tier) “Dunno, she’s cool and all but what I really wanna see from her aren’t her assets.. its her hairstylists number. And probably wanna see if she’s cute without her hair down. Pass!”
Ulla del Milo (A Tier) “One of THE best themed wrestlers in the circuit. She’s wild! I always thought Harpies were ugly flightless chicken women with plucked wings, but hey, I’d Smash this harpy!”
Mizuko Kawajiri (C Tier) “I AM NOT GETTING NEAR HER! This midget would bite me, and I have no kink of being bit!”
Jenny Roduko (A Tier) “She sure got a NICE ass! Tho I gotta say, least Tiger looking Tiger I ever saw. Hmm.. smaaash.”
Rose (B Tier) “Having a persona around being horny, specially as named the Rose of Lust.. hey, respect. Wouldn’t Smash though, so it’s a Pass!”
Rose Gold (S Tier) “She’s small but packing some heat! Someone I definitely want to challenge someday, and.. I’m pretty surprised she could beat Astrid Ostberg out of a sexfight.
Like, huh?? I know Astrids a bottom ass mf but a regular fight? Wild. Also, Smash.”
Courage Takemi (B Tier) “Dunno much about her, but the nerds glasses are cooler than the other two nerds so far. Also helps she has a huge rack.. though she has no drip.. smmmash. Yeah.”
Kyoko Akan (A Tier) “So.. Belly Queen. I think she’s not really anything too spectacular, but I can’t deny the curves! I’ve never had a belly punching thingy before..
Hey Cass, have you-“
“Nope. I don’t think I will.”
“Agreed! But if its with her, I might just bend and do it! Ahaha! Smash!”
Karen Meadows (A Tier) “I heard she’s like Moon Knight. Mindy.. Midnights her alter ego! Like Steven and Marc!”
“No, Marc is.. this would be more like Clark Kent and Superman.”
“I dunno, my gut says Marc and Steven! You can confirm for us! If its the thing Cass says, “Smash!”! If its what I say, also Smash!”
Haruko Tatsumi (A Tier) “Finally, a gal with a cute ass superhero mask. But be honest, just cause I can’t see your cheekbones, do you think your identity is hidden?
“ .. but, Batmans the greatest detective and he lets Robin go out in a smaller mask..”
.. hmm, logic is logic.. Smash!”
Noelle White (B Tier) “You know, I was kinda thinking she was like HUGE and buff, but she’s FIVE EIGHT! A teeny heavyweight.. I wonder how a 5’0 heavyweight would look like. Probably like the stay puft man.
.. I’d Smash that. Though I’ll.. Pass!”
Oscar Orelash (C Tier) “Hey? Ossi is nice!”
“HA! SHE SAID OSSI! IN YOUR FACE!!”
“..??..”
“Ahem, anyways.. thou is not Smashable by the divine likes of myself, me and I. You would probably break like a plate, plus I curse a lot. You’d be like “Oh, don’t curse! Oh, my sEnSiTiVe EaRs! Let’s settle it in the ring!”
“.. mpffh.”
“.. are you laughing? She’s laughing. Anyways, Pass!”
Astro-Not (S+ Tier) “I had a feeling you’d like her, Cyrene.. but S+?”
“Oh yeah. I wanna rip off her costume and see whats inside, like one of those dumb surprise eggs you can get for children. What’s inside is gonna determine if I can Smash or Pass, but I like you very much! But I’m gonna Pass till I see your face! You could be as hot as Trish Strauss, but I can’t be Smashing.. someone that MAY look like Nikocado Avocado!”
Commander Apples (A Tier) “You know, I think this one’s more your type Cassie. So YOU do it!”
“What? Why?”
“Well he puts his butt in faces and you get peoples butts in faces! Its a match made in heaven!”
“.. wh.. wh??.. he’s cute but that’s such a stupid logic! I do not get butts in faces! But sma-.. Smash… Cyrene.. wait, no.. NOOOO-“
“Ahem, anyways.. she’s my butt pillow for the next five.”
Cobalt Comet (A Tier): “His hair looks like a stream of toothpaste. Like you know the thingies you get in ads? That, but brown. He doesn’t look that bad though. Hrm.. I could take him. I could definitely take him. Smash!”
Jess McLeary (S Tier) “She got dat cake. Her headpiece is wiiilddd.. and I do adore her lucha mask. Would I Smash? Nope! She’ll be a Pass for me, but I think I would beat her up to assert my dominance as the best redhead.”
Karbon Mannering (A Tier) “Oh yeah. Dude, you gotta stop screeching “NIIGHTMAREE” when you enter the match and get sat on immediately after. It puts in a bad rep for nightmares.
Dunno tho, it could be kinky. Sm.. pa.. both, depending on my mood.”
Angelina Tarrant (A Tier) “I like her little horns. I wonder how they don’t break off in a match.. but hey, who knows. Maybe they’re just sturdy.. but are they sturdy enough to do lewd stuff with? Anyways, I think I’d vibe with her.. but like, until I get to know the answer of the first question, Pass!”
Vorona (S Tier) “Whoa mama, she dresses GOOD! Like I’ve heard of a cold snap, but she popped off with her outfits, jesus! Bet she knows some killer submissions too! And I usually bug the white haired fucks.. though I’d Smash her silly!”
Huan Lei Brightspring (A Tier) “She kinda reminds me of my ex. Weird.. but she’s definitely one of the best MMA fighters here. I can’t mma.. or well, I haven’t mma’d before and I’d square up against her just to get close! Smash!”
Alicja Piestrzeniewicz (A Tier) “The fuck is that name? She’s capping with it. No way thats her name! Pass!”
“Why does it matter?!”
“ROLEPLAY SEX! How am I gonna be a sexy assassin, a sexy nurse, a sexy evil frog and not be able to go “Why, hello there Mrs Pies.. Pisstre.. Pizsn.. Neini.. Wiz..”
“Piestrzeniewicz. You could also say Alicja, and since she’s Passing, I think you’re lovely a-“
“NOBODY CARES WHAT YOU THINK CASSIE”
“.. I’m not talking to you anymore.”
“Fine!”
“Fine!”
Muffette (C Tier) “You are not a clown, but the whole ass circus. She actually kinda looks like one, but I think she was going with the goth vibe.. but she’s the royalty fister, yeah? Well i haven’t been fisted but I’m also not royalty, so yeah! I’ll dig it! Smash!”
Laurent La Croix (B Tier) “I like bro. But I don’t think bro’s into me. Looks pretty gay. I could probably hook him up with someone, but for me, personally.. Pass!”
Sparkling Idol Barbara (A Tier) “That onesie though- weird wrestling outfit, but I won’t complain. She is hilarious to watch, her matches are what I put on to while the time while I do paperwork. Guess what I do paperwork on Cassie!”
…
“.. right. Anyways! Smash!”
Thunder Flash Keqing (C Tier) “Not BAD, not bad at all.. but her hair is dumb, and she’s got a button nose. Therefore I would Pass, BUT i would also destroy her and keep her as a pet.”
Vamp Suzumori (B Tier) “Ooh, a Vampire. How about a deal, lady! I spill blood, you clean up after me and hise the evidence! I don’t mean murder because this is a promo and I am not indicating myself of any crime whatsoever! Or alternatively, lets have a contest of who can spill more blood! Pass!”
Michelle Bennett-Ashford (A Tier) “Hmm.. I dunno, like I like Michelle. I’ve never met her but she’s a hentai wrestler and I would Smash, but she’s also a milf and I don’t like them THAT much. Cassie, what do..”
…
“Fine! I’m sorry for sitting on your face and being mean to you!”
“.. fine.. I think she gets a Pass from me and you. She just had a baby and I’d feel weird Smashing someone who just had one.”
“Right? Now Smashing her head with a chair, I can get along with.. anyways, Michi-baby, hit me up in a few months!”
“Wh-.. sigh.”
Lady Ciper (A Tier) “HOW DO YOU MAKE A GAS MASK SEXY?? WHAT THE FUCK? I HATE YOU!? Smash!”
Camila Reyez (B Tier) “Why? Why is your whole thing around busting implants? Implants make your boobs bigger, therefore they’re good! Who tf approved this.. but Pass!”
Anelu Ano’ai (A Tier) “Like- Kinda weird how late a Samoan wrestler has appeared.”
“Well this isn’t the full roster, to be fair..”
“True. I do like her pink and yellow hair combo, and her bakery from behind, so.. Smash!”
Renatta Rumble (S Tier) “She’s vibing! I love the little dance aesthetic she got, or should I say aesthethicc-.. her hair looks like a loaf of burnt bread.
How does she make that actually look hot while me getting reminded of it every dang time? Anyways, Smash. She solid.”
Bella King (B Tier) “Redhead. Another one. So many.. but I like her little pose. She sticks out her face and exposes her throat. See it means she’s submissive cuz she’s baring her weak point for better people to exploit!”
“.. or maybe she’s just that confident she can do good?..”
“Hmm.. true. Smash!”
Momo Kazan (A Tier) “I actually like her a lot, but I also fear that she’s too into monke business and will sling stuff at me that I don’t want to be slung at me. Pass!”
Veik (S Tier) “Love her. Badgers are cool and she has no safe word! Hell yeah! I read a book about one called Brock when I was a kid, and Brock was goated. He used a frying pan as a drying pan!”
“No, that was pokemon.”
“Chimichanga, chamichunga. Smash!”
Newbie Nuo (A Tier) “Takes guts to calls yourself a Newbie, wear SUCH a lewd outfit and claim yourself not a masochist. I would..
.. hmm, if you’re a masochist I would Smash, if you ARE, I’d Pass. If you’re in denial, I’d also Smash.”
Maria Lindberg (A Tier) “Another scottish gi- oh swedish. I do like how your outfit looks like a demented childs drawings on a chalkboard, and you’re cute overall.. so Smash!”
Erin O’Sullivan (A Tier) “So she fights with the Drunken Fist, which is hype. Rock Lee me in with that style! But also drunk off their rocker girls aren’t my type, but it also depends on how good of a drunken fisting you could give me..
.. Smash.”
Sven Karlson (S Tier) “Beast Tamer? Heh, you could NEVER tame someone like me! Even though you’re hot and I would Smash the fuck outta you, you just don’t got what it takes to tame me! The rest are just little kitty cats.. I’m wayy above, on the level of the Battle Beast when compared to these lot!”
Karin Shin (A Tier) “Well I hate jobbers, but respect to being the best one! Loserbelt is a wild thing! Though she got better, so she’s not that much of one anymore..
.. you know how I’d design the belt, Cass?”
“How?”
“Have a toilet seat insignia on it with a HUGE L in the middle.”
“.. i.. i mean okay then.”
Charlotte Ravel (A Tier) “She french. I can’t help but think that LAW has more international rep than its own country's reps. Which is pretty wild. And I can’t decide if she’s a pink haired lady or a redhaired one.. but she kicks, which means busted thighs.. so hot.. but she’s a lizard and I don’t like lizards. So.. not hot..
.. hm.. time to go to the ultimate decider. Her height!
She’s taller than me. Pass!”
“.. why?”
“Well because I can’t lift her off her feet while choking her silly! Be creative!”
“I’m glad you didn’t do me then..”
Karen Aoki-Justice (A Tier) “I mean, hot. But her ring name reminds me of that evil dude from the Ladybug cartoon. Hmm.. do we need to pull out the height thing..
.. nah. She got freckles, cool hair AND a tattoo? Hot damn! Smash!”
Astrid Arvidson (S Tier) “Norwegians are cool. I wonder if she’s ever had the Immigrant Song play as she descends from the skies in a burst of absolutely amazingly thunder.. velvet thunder.. blue.. lightning, not thunder..”
“You’re thinking of Th-“
“Yes! Thor! She’s like the woman Chris Hemsworth and she is HOTTER! Smash!”
Tina Kelley (S Tier) “AHAHAHA!! She’s S Tier cause she’s hilarious! Her outfit is horrible.. and impractical, but her fucking stripper name was.. was.. BLOOBIE!! AHAHAHA!!”
“You’re gonna blow a blood vessel..”
“I DONT CARE! Pass!”
Riley Marshall (B Tier) “Coons. I don’t like raccoons. Filthy trash pandas.. I hate you for being hot enough for me to want to bang you. Smash!!”
Astrid Ostberg (S Tier) “So, miss heavyweight world champion is next. Mm.. I wasn’t invited to your wedding though.”
“Why would you be?? She doesn’t know you!”
“I would have been the life of the party! It was probably a stupid wedding anyways.. stop patting me Cass.”
“Its a Smash from her, but she’s too grumpy about it to admit it.”
“..”
Danielle Degardin (C Tier) “She says Tramp unironically! What the hell? Her outfit looks like she lathered herself in glue and tossed herself headfirst into a discarded frill dumpster!.. sigh, the amount of driplessness..
I’d Smash, but only cause that means she gets naked and doesn’t dishonor redheads everywhere.”
Molly Forster (B Tier) “What the heck is up with her little bow tie thingy. Like.. huh..? How does it stay up? Does she use hair gel on it? Bleach? The world needs to know! Oh and she’s a bunny.. I don’t like bunnies until they are swole and have dark skin, like Mirko. I just like Mirko. Pass.
Harmonia Edelstein (B Tier) “What is with this girl? Superstar? Nah, the one thing super about her are her sunglasses, which I intend to break into her house and steal someday. Heard she has a manor, so I may need some help.
Oh well. Would I Smash her.. err..
.. she’s what, Austrian? Pass!”
Finella Edelstein (S Tier) “She’s what, Austrian? Smash!”
“.. ?..”
“She’s a rocking star and the better sister ten ways over.. but also, I fought her once. She tried to keep up with me.. but alas! She could not keep pace with my greatness and succumbed!”
George Fortunado (A Tier) “He’s hot! One of the best dressed person in law, and has killer pecs that you could just squish~ my my! Say, I may just go to his bar and fuck stuff up there, stuff being him! Smash!”
Snakebite (A Tier) “Lady, you use Fishnets in the BEST way possible. Like damn, you’re hot. I wouldn’t mind taking a beating from a monster like you.. and then flip you around and beat your sorry ass into the ground. Smash!”
Sakura Haruno (B Tier) “I will.. maybe Smash that. Maybe. She’s a ninja though.. I could out ninja her any day! I even have a hot ass ninja costume to show off! Smash!”
Phoebe Justice (A Tier) “Oh Phoebeee, I know you’re watching! How you say to hanging out, you and me, alone in an alley with nobody to see.. and no evidence of us left behind, eh? Eh? Smash!”
Vera Sapphire (S Tier) “I don’t really keep up with that many matches, but she entices me. I like her outfit and her gig, and her absolutely killer thighs. She can choke me any day! I’d say.. Smash!”
Heather Sunderland (A Tier) “Excellent use of fishnets, Heather! I will make sure they don’t rip when I strip you! Or maybe they stay on during sex.
Yeah they stay on during sex. Smash!”
Christian Kiryuu (A Tier) “Damn if that isn’t the most girly boy ive ever seen. I’d still Smash that but I fear he seems too lewd for ME..
.. I’ll take it as a challenge.”
Mina Piper (A Tier) “Cute. I like her vibe and I think I could toss her through a couple tables and get the crowd riled up at me for sure. Would I Smash.. hmm.. if I could Smash her ON a table and Smash her through a table.. like sexually, Smash her so hard the table breaks.. and I win like THAT..
.. ooh, that’s an idea. Smash!
Frankie Undergrove (C Tier) “How. How did this one get into the ring? She ain’t even a wrestler, she’s just some derp with a beer belly who smushes people with it?
.. actually, that’s actually pretty funny. Wouldn’t Smash though, but I’m not TOO averse to the idea at all-!”
Little Miss Moxie (B Tier) “I wanna see her and Elizabeth Wild have a match, and I want it to the bloodiest and most badass shit EVER! Once I get my wish, she goes from B to S and Pass to Smash! .. but.. Pass for now.”
Matilda Schroder (S Tier) “I don’t get her deal. She dresses like a wild girl, an atzec warrior, with polka dots.. and a kinda farm girl vibe but has her hair done up in a princess do.
I don’t know what that unholy combination of stuff is supposed to be, but damn if I’m not turned on! Smash!”
Emma Leblanc (A Tier) “Golden Girl? Damn. Not bad, and I usually hate prissy little shits like you, but you seem decent.. and actually make the skirt vibe work well! I’d say.. Smash!”
Kyo Akamatsu (B Tier) “Cute, but he looks like he couldn’t handle me for more than a minute. Guilty of unSmash-until proven otherwise! Pass!”
Maria Tempesta (A Tier) “Heyy, I love the mask + white hair combo she got. She also looks like she would look a m a z i n g being spanked. So imma ready up my spankin hand and you come over here baby, Smash!”
Ksiena Ivanova (B Tier) “You depressed? Why would you call yourself Misery?”
“She could deliver misery. She’s a sadist.”
“Oh.. I see.. I’m a sadist too. Kinda. Sorry babe, we just wouldn’t work.. Smash!”
Alexia (S Tier) “Last on the list! Woo! Anyways, she got that crazy vibe to her, and I would love her! She also won a match with a strap on submission and I wanna do that someday. Huge respect.. Smash!”
“So yeah! Thats my list! You all got a problem with it, well fuck you!
Ahem, anyways.. let me untie you now Cassie. Oh, you did it already.
Oh you left. Well bye Cass! And adios!
P.S- if you would like me to have Cyrene add a character of yours that I didn’t add and want to see it get rated by her, or anyone I missed im so sorry for missing you if I did, PM me on the site or discord! I’ll do it in round 2!”
