As one of LAW's first signings and an infamous figure if then some, it's hard to argue that wherever Karen Starring wanders, chaos tends to follow. With little desire for being a crowd favourite, the bountiful Ms. Starring's effective, signature style has earned her fans all the same.
And now, mere weeks after her tag debut with fellow heavyweight Silver, and after barely letting the dust settle on the amazons announcement of her 'Amazon Classic' challenge series, we get down to brass tax with Karen, in an effort to find out what makes her tick.
---
---
Ms. Starring thank you so much for joining us. Let's start off with the most obvious - What made you request this interview?---
"I have a lot to get off my chest. Plenty of things need clarifying too. It doesn't hurt to remind people what I'm all about, what I'm doing, and why the fuck they can't stop me."
Oh? What's number one on the list?
"Well, for starters. Years back, and I mean, fuckin' years back, when I started out. Like every other fucker who signs up here or anywhere, they ask your personal history, right? Well, for mine, I couldn't be fucked. Like, what business is it of yours? So, I made a load of shit up. There and then."
Oh? Your LAW profile states that you suffer from a form of retrograde amnesia, stemming from a traffic accident in July 2015. Is this not the case?
"Is it fuck."
So what exactly is your story?
"Tch. I'm from Illinois. USA. There was never amnesia, or any traffic shit. I wasn't going to fill out some tell-all history there and then like I was writing a autobiography. I never worked as a bouncer, and I was never scouted. I trained for four years in the Harley Race Wrestling Academy, under my real name, Karen Miller. I came to Japan to further that career. I was 22 when I started LAW, 27 now. That's about it."
Karen Miller? Why the name Starring?
[Laughs] "Do fucking strippers use their real name at work?"
Fair enough. So why the big reveal now?
"I'm sick of monthly therapy sessions. Them trying to 'jog a memory' that doesn't need joggin'. If I knew I'd had to do that shit monthly, I'd of fucking told them the truth there and then. I'm tired of it. My real life ain't as mysterious or interesting, but I don't care. Next question."
Okay. Well. That's certainly a lot to take in. So I'll ask - Why the Amazon classic?
"I figured it was time to put my name on the map. Like, really put my name on there. That fat fuck Kat Hart has her tag reign, Alaina has about a thousand matches under her belt. So I'll do better than both, in my own way. Quality matches from girls I've never fought before. No stupid rules, no cheating, just a good fight. That I'll always win."
Was this by chance at all related to your attempt to call out current heavyweight champion Astrid Ostberg?
[Sighs] "Look, I ain't afraid to say it. But yeh, it is. That blonde got to me, ya know? Like, I'm not saying she had a point. But she didn't not-have one, you get me? I'll get this challenge rolling, step on a few heads, then call her out again. She won't have a choice in saying no next time. And then? Boom, Karen Starring heavyweight champion."
Any women you'd like to step up and accept the challenge?
"That fucking, whats-her-face. Widow girl. She's got a fucking mouth. She can come have a piece. Izzy Delray too. That weird sneak attack cunt. I'd like to see how she does outside of a supermarket, the fucking nob. Lillian Byrne too, fuck it why not. She thinks she's hot shit because she's queen of the middleweights. I'll knock her off her throne."
What made you form a tag with Silver? If you don't mind me saying that's quite the curious team-up
[Laughs] "I like Silver. She means well. And it never hurts to have a friend in your corner too. If I had my pick, no offense to Silver, but it wouldn't have been her. Someone with a mean streak - a good right hook to her. That being said, holy fuck can Silver hit like a freight train. But yeh, it is a curious team-up. Be less curious when we beat the fuck out of the Swat Kats and I step on Kat Harts neck.""
It's certainly a shock to see you in the tag division. What are your thoughts on everything else outside of the heavyweights?
[Laughs] "Very little, to be honest. Not impressed. I don't follow the hentai shit. I've got porn at home, ya know? Middleweights, yeh I suppose. Lillian dickhead isn't doing bad I guess. Be interesting to see who knocks her off. Couldn't give a shit about the lightweights. I thought they stopped midget wrestling back in the 90's to be honest."
And a final question. Rumour is that your dating life has recently come to life. Anything to tell us?
"No."
---
We look forward to following Ms. Starring's Amazon Classic as the weeks go by.
