Full Name: Alvin Simpson
Age: 22
Height: 5"5'
Weight: 133 lbs.
Alignment: Tweener/Lawful Neutral - Jobber
Preferred Matches: Standard, Prisoner of War (POW)
Residence: His Mother's Basement
Twitter: @TotallyNotaSimp
Entrance ThemesD-Don't get me wrong. I am nOt A sImP. Buuuuut if I throw the match now, ya know, give you a free win. Then will you p-possibly go out with me...? Huh? You're saying this is a free win for you regardless...?! W-What's that suppose to mean......?
Causal Theme
Entrance Theme
When it came to romance, Mr. Simpson had even worse luck. He's never had a girlfriend before, since every girl he's ever asked out rejected him. Sometimes it was a vague: "You're just......n-not my type." Other times it was a simple: "No." But all too often, the response was: "EW!" Making matters worse, every time a girl rejected him, Alvin would hopelessly do all in his power to change their minds. Alvin would lay down in puddles to let women walk on him. He also kind of liked it. The simp would do the homework of any gal he had a crush on. Carry her things, drive her around, buy her lunch, buy her partner lunch, etc, etc, etc. The worst part was that less than nice chicks would take advantage of this. Leading Mr. Simpson on and then dropping him, when the poor lad was no longer of any use. This tragic pattern repeated itself through grade-school and even into Alvin's college years.
However, in college Alvin eventually found something to at least distract himself from his undesirable romantic record. He took writing classes such as British Literature and World Literature, and he soon discovered...that he loved writing! He adored researching, creating stories, publishing magazines and the like! Alvin pursued a writing major in college, where he aced all of his classes! He graduated with high honors and even earned respect among his peers, even if the lad was still single. The future was finally looking up for Alvin, who now held a college degree in his right hand!
Now that Mr. Simpson had a degree in writing, he needed to find a way to put it to good use. He also still desired a lover, which remained a seemingly endless endeavor for him. One day while he was out walking, he found a poster regarding LAW's wrestling organization! It was a "help wanted" poster for staff workers, interviewers, magazine writers and the like! Alvin then had a genius idea! He decide to apply for the positions of a magazine writer, interviewer, AND wrestler! This way Alvin could put his writing and researching skills to good use, while also searching for a girlfriend among all the beautiful wrestling gal pals. Alvin's mother had no faith in his ability to ever have a partner, but she supported the decision anyway. After all, it would make him lots of money, so maybe one day Alvin would decide to...MOVE OUT OF HER HOUSE. Nonetheless, The Simping Writer (a name his jerky co-workers gave to him) was born!
Personality: Although he tries to deny this, Alvin Simpson is...a simp. A major simp. He shows excessive sympathy and attention towards all women, with the false hope of winning their affections. Alvin acts like this, even if a girl he's talking to isn't interested in men, much less interested in him specifically. Even among straight girls, Alvin's romantic record is down the toilet and all the way into the gutter. He often makes a fool of himself while trying to please girls, which makes it easy for him to be manipulated and taken advantage of.
Truth be told, the reason Alvin has so much trouble finding someone else, is because he still needs to work more on himself. He's insecure, desperate, anxious, and socially inept, being both socially awkward AND awkwardly social. Unfortunately, his crushes tend not to find these traits very attractive. He does have a good sense of humor, but it's a large self-deprecating one.
On the bright side, when he ISN'T being a huge simp, Alvin is a relatively decent and down-to-earth guy. Despite his love for women, Alvin isn't a perverted creep, showing some degree of class and self-control. This is because he simps for a meaningful relationship, rather than a purely sexual one. Alvin sees POW matches as an chance to a secure a purposeful relationship. But sadly he's more likely to be dommed and done away with, boldly assuming he's wanted around to begin with.
Surprisingly, when he's inside the ring, Alvin doesn't derive any gratification when subjected to humiliation or physical pain. He doesn't even like being smothered, not enjoying the effects of any move that causes oxygen deprivation. Alvin shows more masochistic tendencies outside the ring, but only because he wouldn't suffer the embarrassment of countless fans watching. So he could be described as a closet masochist overall.
Since Alvin is more concerned with meeting girls than beating girls, he doesn't spend much time on his training as a wrestler. However, he takes his jobs as interviewer and magazine writer much more seriously, only wrestling part-time in comparison. When writing, Alvin often tries to creatively engage his readers as much as possible. He also exhibits more confidence, although his insecurities still pop out in his work from time to time. Mr. Simpson secretly wishes he can get a girlfriend by praising wrestlers in his writing, if he can't get one while simping in the ring.
Wrestling Style: Alvin's lack of focus on combat training means he hasn't really carved out a legit fighting style. He's unlikely to take to the air and only can use power moves on significantly lighter foes, but Alvin at least knows the basics in terms of grappling, striking, and submissions. The man can best be described as a jack of SOME trades and a master of none. This of course, leaves him very vulnerable to more skilled opponents. As a simp, Alvin would prefer not the anger or upset his females opponents, in the futile pursuit of earning their affections. So even (on the rare occasion) when Mr. Simpson finds himself in dominate positions, he has trouble bringing himself to fully capitalize on them.
Special Moves: (Moves named by mocking fans, based on his habits in the ring.)
Simp Slap - Alvin throws a punch at his opponent. But do to his simping, it turns into a slap midway, likely just miffing off his foe.
Spoiler
Spoiler
Simpmission - Alvin's best move and potential finisher. The man grabs the legs of his opponent, while they are in a seated position. He then maneuvers down to trap them in the following hold. Unfortunately, due to his simping, Alvin can be easily convinced to release said hold.
(Move Suggested by @AliceBun)
Any and all relatively basic wrestling moves, mostly consisting of grapples, strikes, and submissions.
Stats
Power: 2/5 - Fairly weak. Alvin is pretty puny for a guy. He can slam lightweights, but any gal that does at least a decent amount of strength training is bound to overpower him.
Speed: 3/5 - Average speed. Eh, fast enough but nothing special.
Stamina: 2/5 - Fairly poor endurance. Alvin can last a bit, IF his foe isn't very relentless. But it doesn't take too much to start wearing him down.
Courage: 1/5 - Not brave at all. Alvin is AT LEAST socially intimidated by pretty much every girl he meets. He's liable to run in fear from his foes, when things get tough.
Intelligence: 3/5 - Average intelligence. Due to his simping, Alvin's fighting smarts are pretty lacking. But aside from that, he's a smart guy who gained a college degree in writing. This contrast cancels out to average intellect overall.
Defense: 2/5 - Fairly poor defense. Alvin has a cautious and defensive mindset. But that doesn't mean much, since he's physically inept at taking or countering moves.
Record
Wins: 0
Has Defeated:
N/A
Has Been Defeated By:
Katrina Kelley
Love Interests: Every woman he comes across.
Been Friendzoned By: TBH
Allies: N/A
Rivals: N/A
Enemies: Romeo D. Chad (Made fun of Alvin Simpson in school.)
Other Appearances
With Green Eyes
