Manny man. Tonight was two dumpsters full of ground beef levels of odd. Heroines, yeah. She knew what comics were. And the fact they exist? Also not so odd. LAW has its own Paladin in Trinette Vaillant, with astronomical levels of hot. And The Impossible, a mystery gal with a perma-wedgie and infinite hair product. Also hottie. Haru Matsuno? Holy Booby -- was the first thought. Hottie was the second. And what evil masterminded fuck set this girl up in a sex fight?... And why didn’t I get the shot sooner? Third and fourth. Now was better than never.
Let's go!
The titantron flashed the horned skull, and her
song dropped with its riff and pedals. Always a kick to get the small pack of tryhards in the crowd to nod along. The black shirt and headband horns type. There were always a few. But there were many more who booed instead. Angelina was one of them. She was in the stands, standing amongst the crowd that was reigning down their distaste for their modern-day pirate that had yet to show up. Strawberry slushie in hand, Angelina raised her hand, thumbs down and yelled.
“Go back to N.Y.C, ya shrimp-sized slut-truck!”
The crowd members beside her looked confused. A pair of bros, it seemed.
“Aren’t you…?” They mumbled, and Angelina shrugged.
“What? I can’t roast myself?” Her grin became cat-like, and she tossed the remains of her slushie into the guy’s shirt, then sprinted down the aisle, vaulted the barricade and turned around to walk up the steps backwards, pointing out to the crowd with a flipped bird.
“Keep tryin’ to get undah my skin, Japan! It’s great!”
She turned around, walked along the apron with a hand on the upper rope, stepped onto the outer turnbuckle pads, ran up them, and backflipped into the ring. Always the perfect landing. A bit of pirate magic.
“Yo-yo-yo!” She pivoted on her ankle to face her heroine opponent and made a confidant stride to the ring's heart.
“You sure ya know what ya in for, girl? Because tonight, ya are not only fucked. Ya are also….” Her wrist rolled as she tried to find a better word, looking up to the heavens for Edward Thatch to give her the cue. Nothing came.
“Well....Fucked.”